Angry

Super duper angry! Every time also the same, never stand on my side and think then judge me just like that. Why don't we change our position for some period? I know the problem is growing bigger, that why i want to change and solve, i really could not stand in that situation anymore. But then.....haih..totally fed up!

Not going to explain and hope understanding, know what? Cause when peoples already set in mind that is the answer then that is the answer, never try to understanding! When the time i stress for so much things i face alone, when i need help to solve problem, is just like a big joke!

Whatever, never ask me to explain anymore! Don't said im hiding, is just no understanding!

Dissapointed

I've make a decision bout work, I don't know whether is right or wrong ( i hope is right) but no matter how, the begin meaning was gone, i was so sad but speechless...ya, i am speechless. Suddenly feel that i have no point to start the business, i dint get what i want,dint get what i aspect but i lost many things. Is that really worth for me to start it? It was too late to think bout this question. Everything have change and gone, meaningless.

That why, i decide i change my plan and change everything. Since i feel there are meaningless to me. Work hard, give much but what i get after 1 year? Look at me, what i get and what i have now?

I need to find my way out without them. Nobody are worth for me to rely on..reliable never happen in my life but cheating? Maybe.

I'm in trouble...right now.

Feel wants to write something but is empty right now. when things gain till too much then will cause empty. maybe i should said, when troubles gain till too much. I'm so miss my previous year life style, no big deal to worried about, no debts, i can do whatever what i want, buy whatever what i buy, i can always smile from heart. But now is so difficult to smile from my heart.

How? I couldn't pass it. I just want to cross over. When can i do that?

又傻又累的我

终于完成了答应别人的事，很傻很累人。 =）我就是酱。

我又呕了，可能太饿了，早上九点多吃了我的快熟面，五点多吃了两块小蛋糕，十点半后再到“麻麻档”吃晚餐，回到家却全吐了。唉。。。其实我还肚泻。。 =（ 怎么办？

突然很想念我的长发，有一丝的后悔。许多人都问我，舍得吗？可是不舍得又怎么办？留着真的有用吗？有没有人想过我需要怎样的勇气来把那头长发剪短？陪了我那么久的长发，曾经他最爱的长发，我剪了，不舍就如不舍他。不做第三者就要放弃他，这是我的选择。好久没听到他的声音，那把可以安慰我的声音，哄我入睡的声音。他还真的很残忍。朋友们，我不是忘不了，只是很怀念，别担心。更何况我不打算忘了他，因为越要忘却越忘不了。与其这样不如偶尔想想他，我会更好过一点。他永远都是最好的，至少现在还没出现第二位比他对我更好的人。他的温柔体贴最贴心，谢谢哦，只能怪我没好好珍惜。在外或工作时的我可以很独立，有主见，可是下班后或回家后，我的伪装也下班了，我变得很嗲，懒懒的，名副其实的小女人。可是自从没了他，放工下班回家后我还是那个伪装了的我，不曾休息过。就算生病了还是独自一个人。多久了？嗯。。。很久了。。。怎么我还没习惯？难怪我那么的累。

想起他为我唱的那一首歌-王菲，我愿意。。。很想再听一次，就那么一次，至少在我生病时我想听。我知道无法如愿，没关系，听原唱的也不错。

my bfs's Big Day

Yesterday 9th of Oct was my partner+best friend--Rico, BIG DAY. Yeah~ he getting married, already registered. Happy for him =)

Just back from sing k at Puchong Neway....lolx...i can announce myself bangcrup already, because of the City & Guild certificate, i'm so save for my money >.< be =")

Gambatte Siew Kuan, you can do it ^^

发现

对，我超没安全感。。。

ZerO

I'm so brave today. I've cut my very long straight hair, the hair stylish and shampoo girl keep confirm with me whether i'm really confirm to cut my hair short? Lol... YES! Defintely confirm. =) in mandarin,剪掉三千烦恼丝, i'm totally agree with that. Back to ZERO! I've get a new start.

However Im so cute right now XD Looks like a kid =) My customer Nadia and Rachel also said so...hahaha...new image for me and is my new image for my dear friends also. =)

Ya, todays is my boss-Ernest birthday too. Happy birthday!

New image, new start and NEW ME =)

差！

突然发觉原来一直以来我对别人太好了，对自己太差了！我要好好的善待我自己！付出的一切都是垃圾！

对了，承诺永远都不会发生在我身上，无论是什么关系，承诺永远都是垃圾，只不过是谎言，骗人的！我永远都不会相信。承诺根本就是屁话！

每次都是我在让步，我不是没脾气，只是不想吵！我不是要依赖，只是怕做错决定！一切的一切·都是我想太多，现在才知道我多幼稚！到底有没有人还记得开始的阶段？开始时说过的话到底记得吗？无论是ex，朋友，战友都是一样的。。。骗人，都骗人的。开始辛苦时的那段日子根本就被遗忘了，只有我一个那么的笨，还在相信我们都维持着之前的关系。根本没有一个人坦诚一切，全都收起来不说，剩下的就只是埋怨彼此。

失望透了！烂透了！

早安，晨之美

累了，所以放弃。

Busy Working Day

* ( My childhood dance partner ^^)*

Today was my busy day. Is good to me because it mean my shop got lots of customer *weeeee* But it makes me feel tired because or not enough staff. Previous days i was just so weak because of my gastric, no matter how many times i get warning from doctors or my bfs, i will still gastric. Yeah~ it just because im notty, dint follow their advise, so what i get is eat lots of medicine and wasting money to look over doctor... lolx..

While driving back home form work, there are somthing fly over my mind. I so need and hope i can live follow the schedule. What i mean is really follow the time table and live, is that possible to me? I really wanted to go gym every morning, then have my vitamin C, breakfast, work, lunch/tea time, back home, do my own things, do my own practical, then sleep early. When can i do that? hmmm.......seriously i really want to.

Yesterday i saw some picture that really can make me "let go" him(heart break). Finally, i can do that. Even that picture make me feel pain. But is really the time to let go and i have my own life without him. No matter how sick am i, how moody am i, how sad am i, how angry am i,how happy am i, i would not look for him anymore. I promise to myself. Promise is always a promise.

So now i just need to concentrate on my business, practical, exam, partners, bfs, family....I've got lots of things to do and prepare, i noe im wasting my practical time, but what to do, no mood for that at the moment..sigh~ I will cheer myself up soon, very soon. =)